In a thought-provoking episode of the Middle School Walk and Talk podcast, host Phyllis Fagell and Jessica McGuire sit down with Brooklyn Raney, a practitioner researcher who studies and consults on the ethics of care in educational settings. Known for her innovative advisory curriculum and her advocacy for every student having a “trusted adult,” Raney shared her journey and findings that are reshaping how educators approach student relationships. Her focus on creating a nurturing school environment where students feel genuinely supported is the subject of her latest book, Successful Middle School Adult Advocates. Listen to the podcast episode now, or enjoy the written recap here.
The Essence of Being a Trusted Adult
Raney’s work began from a place of observation and necessity in her role as an educator. She noted, “I sat with my advisees, telling them to stay off their phones, stay focused, like every other teacher, but then realized every program we had was essentially saying the same thing: relationships are key.” Her research pivots on three core principles for educators to embody:
- Accessible: “It’s about advertising that you’re interested in connection,” Raney explains, advocating for educators to show they are present and attentive to students’ needs.
- Boundaried: Boundaries are crucial, not just for student safety but also to maintain the sustainability of the adult’s role. “Boundaries anchor our work, keeping it sustainable,” she notes.
- Caring: This isn’t just about showing affection; it’s about a deep belief in students’ potential and well-being. “Care means advocating for their goals and success in their terms,” Raney asserts.
Tailoring to Teacher Strengths
Understanding that not every teacher is naturally adept at forming deep personal connections, Raney introduces a framework to match educators’ strengths with student needs. She describes four types of mentors:
- Cheerleaders for encouragement.
- Challengers who push students towards growth.
- Comforters who offer support and empathy.
- Coaches who guide through direct teaching or advice.
Raney shared an anecdote from a summer camp, illustrating the balance of these roles: “We had a girl who was homesick, tears streaming down. My instinct was comfort, but after days of comforting we’d made no progress. My partner, a challenger, said, ‘Dry up. You’re the best rock climber here. You need to get out there.’ That was the last tear we saw.”
Navigating Expectations and Boundaries
Raney emphasizes the need for clarity in expectations, which she illustrated with an engaging activity called the “clapping contest.” Here, participants experience firsthand the frustration of unclear expectations. “By the end, the clapper was sweating, symbolizing how students feel when they don’t know what’s expected of them,” she explains. This activity serves as a reminder for educators to set explicit, achievable goals for students.
Perhaps one of the most liberating insights Raney offers is the acknowledgment that not every educator needs to be the go-to person for every student. She advises, “You will not be everybody’s somebody. When we chase them, they run.” Instead, she promotes creating an environment where students naturally gravitate towards adults who provide presence, play, and possibility.
Raney shared a personal story about her son, Landon, demonstrating this principle. After he experienced a disappointing social encounter at school, she had struggled to cheer him up. But later, at the gas station, a chance encounter with a summer job mentor lit up Landon’s day in just two minutes by acknowledging his contribution, showing how even brief, genuine interactions can be transformative.
Raney’s contributions through her research and practical applications offer a path for educators striving to make a difference but seeking sustainability. By fostering environments where students feel named, known, and valued, educators can significantly influence students’ academic success, emotional growth, and social development.